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I can't even [walk]...

The lyrics to an old song have flooded my soul since meeting with a sweet friend over the weekend. We met for coffee on a cool crisp morning yet warmed up through laughs while sharing our heart for the Lord and His purpose in our lives. We talked about the business of life, and even giggled at how much we should appreciate our husbands for loving us through our every whim. My friend mentioned a line to an old song, (that's since been running through my mind) she said "I can't even walk without Him holding my hand!" Though we laughed at the time those words seemed to marinate in my spirit. I found the song on Spotify and listened to it on repeat for the rest of the day.


So often I hear the phrase "I can't even!" Referring to the fact that one is so overcome with emotion or reaction that they simply cannot comment on the matter at hand. However this catchphrase seems to go right along with the old song, and I am declaring it as my 2020 anthem... Listen to these words;

"I can't even walk, without you holding my hand. The mountain's too high, the valley's too wide. Down on my knees, is where I learned to stand, I can't even walk without you holding my hand."

When I hear this old chorus my mind drifts back to our Old Country Church, the one-room schoolhouse that was freezing cold in the winter. I can almost hear the sweet voice of my Aunts and Uncles and the tune of my Dad's guitar. Back then songs weren't rehearsed, they were more of a testimony than anything. Or a song of hope, sung with proclamation that it truly was going to be worth it afterall.


One thing that the Lord has been telling me lately is to rest. The details on this rest revelation will have to be another post for another time, but I want to remind someone today that God is still present in the rest season. And not only is He present, but maybe He is beckoning you to this sweet rest (like He has been me) because He knows what lies ahead. And He knows that you need to come near and fill up, because you will need to glean from this season in your time of harvest that lies ahead. I heard a preacher say the other day that so often we think harvest time is a time to sit back and enjoy the blessings of God. While each season is meant for enjoyment, farmers tend to work MOST at harvest time. Yes, they get a payback for their work at the harvest time, but to actually GET the fruit of the harvest, you must work the field. (you'll get that one in a minute..)


So often I think we fall into the trap of thinking that unless we are running here and there, we aren't fulfilling the call of God on our life. While I am totally all for a believer who works I am also learning that rest is more than saying "no" to overbooking your calendar. It is a mindset of rest that the Lord wants us to adopt. That no matter what commitments we have, no matter how many ministries we run, no matter how many kids we have, no matter what you're doing for dinner... you can rest in God. Because He is present in every detail, walking beside you ever step of the way. And the enemy that's whispering to you that God doesn't care about that thing, go ahead and tell him that he's a liar. The word tells us that God is concerned about what we are concerned about. So that tells me that if my brain is taking the energy to think or worry about something, it is big enough to pass along to Jesus.


I am a rather independent lady, and while many view this as a strength, when it comes to the kingdom it can work against me. Yes, God has given us the ability to think, reason and use wisdom. Yes, there are times that God expects us to move forward based on faith. However I think that sometimes in our spiritual walk, we can get to a place where we are literally doing everything we can think to do within our own power, and if we are not careful we will burn out from spinning our wheels... all the while God is simply asking us to just Hold his hand. Depend on Him for the answers. Depend on Him for the Strength. Depend on Him. You know what holding someone's hand forces you to do? It forces you to walk the same pace as the person you are joined with. You cannot hold hands effectively while one person races ahead of the other. You cannot hold hands with someone who is walking at a confident pace forward while you are dragging your feet.




That my friend, is what I feel God is trying to show us today. Something as simple as walking, something we don't necessarily NEED God to help us with. I mean lets think about my 1-year old for instance. He knows how to walk and really doesn't need to hold my hand anymore. However I know that he will be the safest when he is holding my hand. I will prevent him from falling, I will prevent him from running too fast so that his feet get ahead of his body. I will keep him safe. No, he doesn't need to hold my hand. But it will be better in the long run if he does. That's it friends. God wants to {w a l k} with us. And do you know what else walking hand in hand symbolizes? Relationship. He wants one of those with you too.


So today, In my transparent state I will be the first to say that so often I look to God the Father and in essence I say "thanks for the great idea!" and I take off running, leaving God in the rocking chair on my porch. And guess what that gets me? It gets me frustrated, overtired, overworked, and flat out exhausted. When in reality I should take God by the hand, talk with Him about the ideas, plans and desires of my heart, and listen to his advice, and watch him work everything out perfectly. Now, I am no saying that I leave God in left field because I couldn't even make it through a day without his help. But what I am saying, is that I don't even want to walk without holding his hand. Whether it is through the valley or on the mountain top, I cannot afford to set my pace ahead of him. I cannot afford to leave Him one step behind or in front of me. I cannot make it one moment without him holding my every thought.


I hope this comes across clear to you today. My thoughts feel rather jumbled but I pray my heart was conveyed in a manner that leaves you ready to embrace the Lord with every plan, every thought, and every talent that you have. Because I promise you, if you take off running when He is ready to talk to you on the porch, you will be left spinning your wheels.


Until next time, I'm your partner in battle Crystal Komala


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